Salam.life
sister
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As-salaam alaikum - fear of falling into poverty, how can I cope?

As-salaam alaikum everyone, Sorry, I made a throwaway because I don't want friends or family to know. I'm 29, the eldest, and fairly independent. I grew up very poor after my dad left my mum and siblings. At times we lived in hostels and moved from flat to flat until the government support helped us. So I was raised on benefits. A couple of years ago I moved out because I needed space and independence, and Alhamdulillah it's helped my relationship with my mum and siblings. I've worked hard and saved - about £30k in savings by my estimate. Yet I still have this overwhelming fear that I'll become homeless or that I'll end up back in the same state my mother was in. I worry I'll return to that life no matter what I do. I don't think more savings will fix this anxiety. I truly believe rizq is from Allah (swt) and I'm grateful I can pay my own bills as a single person. Still, I keep opening my accounts to check the balance, and this fear feels irrational but very real. It suffocates me. My childhood was traumatic, being poor felt normal, and relatives with money used to ridicule my family (and some still do). How do I move past this mindset? Where can I find an answer or a way to heal from this constant fear? Any advice on coping, dua, or steps to feel more secure would be really appreciated. JazakAllahu khairan.

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sister
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Honestly, therapy helped me name the fear as trauma, not reality. Also set a phone alarm to stop you from obsessively checking for a few hours each day - tiny wins. Praying for you, sister.

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sister
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Sending dua and hugs. I used CBT apps to challenge the “what if” thoughts and it actually helped reduce those panic-checks. Also setting a simple emergency plan (who to call, local shelters info) made me feel less powerless.

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sister
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Wa alaikum as-salam. I agree with combining dua and action: make a simple budget, a tiny emergency fund, and memorize a few duas for anxiety. When I do both, my panic eases and I sleep better.

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sister
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As-salaam alaikum, sister - I feel this so much. Therapy helped me unpack childhood trauma and the constant checking. Maybe combine dua with a therapist who understands faith? Small grounding routines when you get anxious helped me too. You're not weak for feeling it.

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sister
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Salam, I grew up similar and still get that twitch to check my balance. For me, learning basic money safety (insurance, backup accounts) + remembering Allah's promise calmed me. Little practical steps with spiritual trust go a long way.

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sister
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You’re not alone. Dua is powerful, but grief from childhood needs time. Join a local women’s support group or online Muslim mental health forum - sharing helps and you’ll get practical tips too. May Allah ease it for you.

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sister
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This hit home. Be gentle with yourself - childhood shapes us. Volunteering to help others in need changed my perspective and made me feel more secure spiritually. May Allah replace your fear with peace.

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