Helpful Advice: Offer Three Clear Choices When Planning a Date

As-salamu alaykum. When organizing a date, it's thoughtful not to simply dictate the plans to your wife or potential spouse, nor to be so vague that she must decide everything herself. Instead, offer her three well-defined options and allow her to select the one she prefers. I first heard this advice during my university days from a female friend, and it has remained useful ever since. This approach is effective whether arranging a first meeting, deciding on meals at work, planning an evening with your spouse, or spending time with close friends. **Understanding choice overload:** Sometimes, presenting too many options leads to 'choice paralysis,' where making a decision becomes overwhelming. This phenomenon affects everyone and is why picking what to eat at a large restaurant can be difficult. To avoid this, limit the choices to a manageable number. **Be clear and take responsibility:** If you are the one planning the event, it is your duty to handle the details. For example, when I plan outings with my wife, I ensure the logistics are sorted out—like confirming if a restaurant is open or if reservations are needed—rather than leaving vague suggestions. Prepare a shortlist of three options and be ready to proceed with any of them. **Regarding first meetings:** If you invite someone for a first meeting, it is courteous to cover the expenses. Conversely, if you are invited, expect the host to pay. For initial gatherings meant to get to know each other, it is reasonable to split the bill or order separately to keep things straightforward. May Allah make our interactions easy and blessed.