Feeling Lost and Doubtful During a Hard Time - Need Help, Please

As-salamu alaykum. This is my first time writing something like this, so sorry if it’s messy. I’m a younger brother, born and raised in the West, and I’ve been raised Muslim my whole life. My mom is very devout and that’s why I’m still holding on. The past couple years my mental health has been getting worse and it goes up and down a lot. I’ve had doubts before but they were usually short-lived and I kept practicing. Lately things have crashed - I used to have constant thoughts about ending my life and I’ve been slipping into that passive mindset for years, only Allah’s command keeping me from acting on it. I don’t really know where to start. I have no one I feel I can talk to: my parents don’t know much about these issues, I don’t have siblings to turn to, and I’m not in a position to see an imam right now. I also struggle to trust my own thoughts with anyone, so asking for help makes me terrified. The only reason I haven’t completely lost my way is because of the faith my mother taught me. I don’t want to go into disbelief, not for a second, but I’m at a point where I don’t know what I believe anymore. Every day I’m just trying to get through it and get home - I barely have the energy to do my work, and at home chores leave me no time or strength to open the Qur’an and reflect. I’ve always been curious about other religions and that curiosity now turns into a constant fear: what if Islam isn’t right, or what if nothing is right? That fear eats at me. Sorry for rambling, but the short version is: I’m having a mental breakdown and it’s shaking the faith I had, and I really need something - some support, guidance, or reminder - to pull me back. If anyone has gentle advice on how to cope with doubt while struggling with depression, or suggestions for small, realistic steps to reconnect with Allah and the Qur’an when you have almost no energy, I’d be grateful. JazakAllahu khair.