Assalamualaikum - Seeking Support After a Tough Year, Looking for Guidance and Company
Assalamualaikum my brothers and sisters. I didn’t plan to write this, it just came out of me and I hope someone can listen. 2025 has been one of the hardest years of my life. End of last year was full of hope - I had a steady job, I booked tickets to travel to Saudi to meet my parents and siblings after 7–8 years, and I even completed Umrah, alhamdulillah. I also met a wonderful woman and her family and we were talking about marriage. She seemed like everything I could ask for in a wife, and we discussed me moving to Saudi for work and getting engaged. For the first time in many years I felt like my life was finally moving forward (I’m 37 and a late bloomer). But around April–May things began to fall apart. I lost a very young cousin in a freak car accident (there were other passengers who survived), and I lost a close friend unexpectedly - he was healthy and his family chose not to have an autopsy. I also lost an uncle and an aunty within a short time. Later I lost my job. Problems had been building for a while - salaries were delayed and eventually I was let go during restructuring. Since then I’ve applied to hundreds of jobs worldwide with no success. I sometimes get an interview but it never leads anywhere. I’ve been unemployed for five months and the uncertainty is crushing. During all this the relationship with the woman I met ended by mutual consent and we cut contact. It was respectful, and I understand her hesitation about moving to my country - life here can be very difficult for someone who hasn’t lived here before. I really wished it had worked out; she and her family were wonderful and I cared about her deeply. What makes things worse is my deen has suffered. For the first time in a long time I missed Jummah yesterday. I can’t keep my prayers or other ibadah consistent. I’m not sleeping, living alone, and my thoughts are spiraling. I have a history of depression and I’m afraid it may be coming back. I’m asking for a supportive brother or sister - someone who can be a mentor, give positive encouragement, or walk me through practical steps to rebuild my life and faith. Advice on job search strategies, ways to restore regular ibadah and mental steadiness, or simply a compassionate person to check in with would mean a lot. May Allah make things easy for all of us. JazakAllahu khairan for reading and for any help or dua.