As-salamu alaykum - I'm so exhausted
As-salamu alaykum. I don't know what to do anymore, and I'm really tired. I feel like there's no way out. I constantly sense air bubbles coming from my anus, and I'm sure I feel them. People keep telling me that if I'm not certain something came out, I shouldn't repeat the prayer, but the problem is I am certain when I feel those bubbles. The sensations aren't always present - sometimes only once a day - so I can't say I'm excused from the obligation. Because of that I feel I must repeat the prayer every time I feel the bubbles. This has become very heavy to bear. From the moment I wake up I start worrying about prayer. While praying I stress about the prayer I'm making and already about the next one. Even at night I can't rest; I dream about it. This takes over my whole mind. There's hardly a moment I'm not thinking about it. I feel like the only solution is to repeat the prayer each time I sense the air, and that thought drains me mentally and emotionally. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm tired of hearing the same advice like “if there is no certainty, your wudu isn't broken” or “you can be considered excused,” and at the same time I'm exhausted from having to repeat prayers so often. Sometimes I end up repeating one prayer five times and making wudu eight times just for that single prayer. I believe there must be a solution, but this situation feels so complicated and overwhelming. I cried so much, I'm so worn out.