A Journey Back to Deen

Assalamualaikum my brothers and sisters, I'm reaching out for guidance and support as I strive to reconnect with my faith. It's been a challenging journey since my father passed away during the Covid pandemic. Although I didn't regularly pray before, I always held onto my faith in Allah and spoke to Him during difficult times. However, my father's sudden passing left me shaken and angry with Allah. My father was a devout Muslim who prayed all his prayers and reminded me to do the same whenever we met. I couldn't understand why Allah took him away, and it made me question my own faith. Alhamdu lillah, my mother has always been a source of guidance, encouraging me to pray and follow the deen, but I didn't listen. The distractions of this world, including work and the internet's negative propaganda against Muslims, further distanced me from my faith. Lately, I've been feeling lost and miserable, and seeing the struggles of our Muslim brothers and sisters in war-torn areas has filled me with a sense of shame and helplessness. I've realized that the best way I can help is by strengthening my own faith and getting closer to Allah. I'm seeking help to learn how to pray properly, read the Qur'an, and follow the deen. I've forgotten many surahs, so I'm essentially starting from scratch. I'd appreciate any recommendations for books, YouTube guides, or content creators that can aid me in my journey. I plan to start attending my local masjid and learning from the community, but for now, I'll start slowly on my own. My goals are to let go of my materialistic worldview, earn a stable income, and use my resources to support the Ummah. I promise to myself and Allah to stay committed to this path. Please keep me in your prayers, and I'll do the same for you, insha'Allah.