Just needed to share what's on my heart

Assalamu alaikum, everyone. I've always held onto my faith, but last year was really tough for me. I fell into making some poor decisions that I deeply regret now, actions that were against our deen. Looking back fills me with so much guilt. I know in my heart that Allah (SWT) is the Most Merciful, but I feel the weight of my mistakes and know I need to seek His forgiveness sincerely. To help with this feeling and to draw closer, I'm hoping to perform Umrah soon, insha'Allah. The memories of my past actions, especially during a blessed time like Ramadan, keep coming back to me. It's a difficult phase as I'm also trying to focus on my Master's studies while living at home with my parents. I don't doubt Allah's mercy for a second, but I'm struggling to feel that strong connection of emaan right now, even though I want to and especially during this holy month. I suppose I'm just looking for a bit of reassurance and to hear from others. Has anyone else been through something similar? What helped you find peace and strength again? Would making a consistent effort in Tahajjud be a good path for seeking forgiveness? I'd really appreciate any advice or thoughts you might have to help me move forward and feel better.