Feeling So Weary on This Path...

Assalamu alaikum. I'm really struggling right now. I deal with depression and ADHD, and it makes everything feel so difficult, even the basics like making wudu and praying on time. I end up delaying my prayers and staying up until the early hours just to get them done. Ramadan was a better time for me, but now things are slipping back, and I don't know if this is a test from Allah (SWT) or if I'm just failing at the simplest acts of worship. My parents try, but they don't always get it. My father said this isn't how a Muslim should be, and I think he worries I'm losing my mind-I even had a breakdown once when he was talking to me after a very late Isha prayer. My mother says it will get better if I push through and don't listen to the whispering doubts, but that feels impossible right now. I know honoring parents is a huge part of our faith, and I feel terrible for any disrespect, but it's so hard when you feel misunderstood at home. Today, I couldn't even manage to pray Isha. It feels like I'm getting worse. I carry some hurt from my past at an Islamic school where I was bullied so much that I stepped away from prayer and my deen for a while. I came back to praying eight months ago, but these overwhelming thoughts won't leave me. I stumble over my words in salah, I overdo wudu, I fixate on getting every posture and recitation perfect, and then I instantly forget what I've just done. If anything goes wrong, I just break down crying. I desperately want to love Allah (SWT) and find peace in prayer, but when I make a mistake, my mind goes to such dark places about harming myself. Those old, painful urges are coming back because of all this. I feel like I'm losing my grip, and I feel awful for the strain it puts on my family. I just want to be a better Muslim, but everything I try seems to make me dread prayer even more. If anyone has been through something similar or has any gentle advice, please, I could really use some support.