Feeling Lost in a Cycle of Sin

As-salamu alaykum everyone. For years, I've been trapped in haram habits that I'm deeply ashamed of-from inappropriate online content to acts of Zina. It started when I was young, with me ignoring prayers for games and videos, and it grew into something much worse where I sought out wrong companionship for money. Alhamdulillah, by telling my mother and letting her monitor my spending, I've avoided that for over three years now, but the struggle isn't over. I still find myself looking at haram things and giving in to urges almost every week, despite knowing Allah is watching and despite my love for reading the Quran, which I find peaceful. Even in Ramadan or after salah, the temptations hit just as strong, and I feel stuck, wondering if I've lost Allah's mercy. I wrestle with questions about free will and punishment, feeling like I'm in a loop with no way out. Sometimes, I get so hopeless that thoughts of ending my life cross my mind, but I know that's not the answer because Jahanam is real. I'm grateful for my blessings-food, life, and hopes for a job-but this addiction makes me feel powerless. If I can't stop, I fear what I might do, and I'm reaching out for any guidance or support from my fellow Muslims. How do I break free from this?