Is It Necessary to Follow Religion?

Assalamu Alaikum everyone. I'm a 22-year-old sister, and I'd like to share some thoughts about my faith. Please don't take it as disrespectful! 🙃 I attended an Islamic school with very strict rules, and we had religious lessons that heavily emphasized following Islam. My family also holds tight to cultural customs-not exactly religious, but rather outdated traditions influenced by culture. The thing is, I struggle with salah. During Ramadan, I usually pray all five daily prayers and fast, but afterward, I lose all motivation. I can't help but wonder: what would I gain from praying regularly? What's the purpose? And when it comes to hijab and modest dress, I only wear them because my family expects it, not out of personal choice. But that doesn't mean I want to dress immodestly-just that I wish I could skip the abaya, dress as I like, and explore fashion and style. Even though I've been raised in a Muslim environment, I don't feel a genuine love for Islam or a desire to practice it consistently. I see people who aren't practicing, yet they seem happy, well-off, and blessed with everything our society dreams of. I also feel like Allah doesn't accept my duas. He has put me in difficult situations I had no control over, like family issues and an extremely patriarchal, conservative household where only women are forced to follow religion. I've become pessimistic, thinking my prayers won't be answered and I'll never have the life I dream of. Some dreams have already slipped away due to circumstances and my difficult family. I've grown to hate my life and lack self-love. I used to be so energetic and full of love, but now I have no interest in this life. I worry about how I'll spend the rest of my days-unable to achieve my dreams of financial independence, traveling abroad, and more. I'll just end up living an average life like many Pakistani women, trapped in the very customs I despise. I lack the courage to rebel or make the right decisions. It feels like Allah has written my fate in a way that's nearly impossible to escape. Sometimes I wonder: if I start praying again, will my life change? Will my duas be accepted? I know for some people, life improves after they start practicing, but I fear it'll never happen for me. I feel like a sinner whom He doesn't love.